Moods. They are all over the place and change so rapidly I’m surprised I don’t have whiplash. This minute I feel leveled, devastated, sick to my stomach. Last night, I felt comfortable sitting here on the sofa with my husband in front of the fire watching the Olympics. I later felt comfortable making love. Yesterday morning, I was almost cheerful; Saturday night, I was in a panic after he reminisced about having previously driven the route we were taking when he was alone. Or was he?
It’s impossible to know everything.What triggered this last two weeks of wicked mood swings? I was worried that I was taking the affair way too well. I was angry a very little bit of the time, here and there. When H. withdrew one day and suggested that the timing of a question about the affair was inappropriate, I came unglued.Inappropriate? Inappropriate? My question about my husband’s practice of infidelity, an adulterous affair, cheating, was inappropriate? Did he really say that? Did I really hear it?
After His Affair 
Wow. I would think that upon admitting to you that he’d had an affair, he would expect that questions are going to come. And given that what he did was as inappropriate as something could possibly be, how dare he suggest that YOU are inappropriate. That angers me, and I don’t even know you!
Thanks! Our marriage is changing, that is for sure. There was some double standard stuff going on, I see, now and I call him on it every day and he lets me and is learning a wonderful, new thing: humility. Love it.
Danica,
This is so frustrating for you. You are to blame? He dreams of YOU doing horrible things to HIM? This sounds like highly manipulative behavior from him. What exactly does he want from you? Is he pushing to get you to abandon the marriage? Is the affair really over? Unless this guy is seriously immature or brain damaged, my guess is that something is amiss and I am guessing he has not agreed to counseling?
L