My husband thought the email was a good idea, and read it when I had finished.  At that, I sent it.

The day after I sent the email, H. was checking his voicemail at work when he heard her voice.  He immediately hung up, he says, but then thought he should listen to it to make sure she wasn’t packing her belongings and heading to our house.  The message said,

“Hi honey! I don’t know why you threw me under the bus, but I guess you had to.  I intercepted Lyn’s email to Bob and deleted it.  That shows just what a psycho she is, huh?”

I don’t remember exactly what H. told me she said after that, only that if it was true and he really meant it?  To send her back all the stuff she sent him.

We sat together after he told me this and I suggested we send the email again and let him know it was coming.  I modified the email a bit, and H. called their number, with ours blocked, and spoke to OW’s husband.  He identified himself and said,

“My wife has sent you an email in response to your card.”

“Thank you,” said OW’s husband, “Have a good evening.”

?

This is what I presume the OW’s husband read when he went to check his mail:

Dear Bob,

Thanks so much for the Christmas card and enclosed documents.  Very clever way to get that information to me, much appreciated.  I also very much appreciate your situation and am very sorry that you have suffered with it for so long.

I apologize for my husband’s sleazy behavior.  Call it immoral, stupid, moronic, or whatever you like, but I am very sorry that he was so weak that he found it impossible to resist your wife’s letters and found it necessary to follow up and act on their adolescent fantasies.  He tells me that he deeply regrets their involvement and its impact on both our marriages and is deeply disturbed with his actions.  I blame him for being an immature ass and also for not being direct and firm in ending this nonsense once and for all when it should have been, continuing to read your wife’s emails and taking pity on  her moods  or whatever the problem is.   I blame him for being gullible, selfish and  ridiculous and I blame your wife for being brazen, manipulative and selfish.

My husband has implemented blocks on the net and set his email accounts to delete your wife’s emails before they go into his mailbox so that he will never see them, since she persists in contacting him, still.  He has decided that he will inform me when your wife contacts him in any other way.  He says it is over and has been, I am saying it is totally over and your wife should not think she has any hope with my husband.

She is not to come near or to contact my husband in any way and if she finds her whining, narcissistic carcass anywhere near us, I will file a restraining order.

I hope that you find this satisfactory.  No offense is intended to yourself, you have suffered enough.  I hope that you and I will not have to contact one another further, but I intend to do so if your wife continues to chase and throw herself at my husband. I find it highly inappropriate that she was at my mother-in-law’s funeral and consider it an act of tremendous disrespect towards our family. Your wife has a peculiar difficulty.  She apparently feels that she is special enough that the words “No,” and “It’s over,” “Do not contact” do not apply to her.  She has been wrong.

Thanks again,

Lyn

This time, my husband copied the email to the OW.