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Notes From The Wreckage
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Category Archives: Reactions
The Patraeus Affair and Secrets
As the Patraeus affair remains newsworthy, at least, to the moronic media, we, here, at our house have barely mentioned it. We don’t watch much broadcast news, here, at home, although Husband gets more than plenty since he is in … Continue reading
Decisions
“I’ve always said, it’s not conflict which kills a marriage; it’s unresolved conflict.” The concept of any decisions needing to be made confronted me by way of my closest guy friend, someone I’ve known fornearlyever. I spilled my guts and he reacted, … Continue reading
Posted in Anger, Reactions, Revenge, You Can Burn His Stuff
Tagged decisions, divorce-worthy, unresolved conflict
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Introduction – You Can Burn His Stuff Later
Letters and answering them have brought to my attention the need for a little guidance when slapped in the face by discovery of an affair. I was in shock, for weeks, let alone the next day or the first week. Paralyzed, actually, … Continue reading
Posted in Advice, Behavior, Emotions, Fear, Reactions, Recovering, You Can Burn His Stuff
Tagged respect, uncertainty
6 Comments
The Comfort of Laura
When I first learned of the affair, I told 2 people very close to me, both of whom were furious with anger. One was female, the other male; people who have known me all or most of my life. When … Continue reading
Anniversaries, Tragedy, Chutes and Ladders
The odd bad day turned into a bad week which spun out into a bad month. Anniversaries; of my mother-in-law’s death, which we never mourned properly because of the interruption of the discovery of the affair, 19 days later. A … Continue reading
Posted in Dear Peggy, Peggy Vaughan, Reactions, The Reveal, What Would Peggy Say?, You Can Burn His Stuff
Tagged anniversary, pain, tragedy
1 Comment
The Odd Bad Day
It’s been so long since I’ve had a bad day that I’ve forgotten when the last one was. I hit a couple of rough patches in June and July, but August was a welcome time of shift in focus and … Continue reading
Posted in Other Woman, Reactions, Triggers
1 Comment
Not So Fast…
It totally figures. Finally, you realize that you’re not thinking about What Happened every waking minute or even every other waking minute. In fact, you can’t quite remember the last time you were even experiencing angst or fury or vengeful … Continue reading
From Now On?
Someone tweeted, “One’s best success comes after their greatest disappointments.” ~ Henry Ward Beecher. I don’t remember who the **** Henry Ward Beecher is, but, really? Really, Henry Ward Beecher? Because if I decide to believe this, and I have … Continue reading
Posted in Affair, Anger, Betrayal, Discontent, Emotions, Grief, Our marriage, Reactions, Secrets
8 Comments
Her Facebook
It happens every couple of weeks, when things get feeling a little too “back to normal” and it begins to feel like I am doing all of the heavy lifting in marriage recovery. You know, the reading, the reflection, the … Continue reading
Posted in Affair, Anger, Emotions, Facebook, Lost Love, Opportunity, Other Woman, Our marriage, Reactions, Secrets, Shock
4 Comments
Why Do I Care?
Why do I care that she is younger than I am? Dunno. Just sort of do. What am I really upset about? Okay, I’ll tell you. Elizabeth called me the other day to catch up and she mentioned Tiger Woods’ … Continue reading
Posted in Affair, Anger, Discontent, Emotions, Other Woman, Reactions, Step-families
2 Comments
Shut Up
I love telling my husband to shut up. I haven’t done it for a while and I only began doing it a couple of years ago and although it violates my long-established philosophy of life to say it? I get … Continue reading
Posted in Anger, Behavior, Betrayal, Emotions, Other Woman, Reactions, Shock
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Sad and Suspicious
It’s been a sad two weeks. A person who made a great impact on my life died. His funeral is today, but I don’t think I am going to put myself through that. I will just keep in mind that … Continue reading
Posted in Depression, Reactions, Suspicion
3 Comments
Moods
Moods. They are all over the place and change so rapidly I’m surprised I don’t have whiplash. This minute I feel leveled, devastated, sick to my stomach. Last night, I felt comfortable sitting here on the sofa with my husband … Continue reading
The Promise
He was distressed over the promise he made two months ago. I asked him to tell someone about the affair. He asked me what he could do and I told him what I wanted him to do “without discussing it … Continue reading
He Is Sad, Today
He’s sad, today. Last night he wanted to hold me and kiss me and be close, but this morning, he was remote. Maybe it was because I brought up something he didn’t want to discuss, namely, some things said during … Continue reading
Posted in Behavior, Reactions
2 Comments
The Other Shoe
Finally. I am starting to thaw. I skipped over a lot of stuff in my mission to get things where they are “supposed” to be without realizing all of the sacrifices I was making. It occurred to me, yesterday, after … Continue reading
Posted in Affair, Our marriage, Reactions
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Shock
“Whatever you are thinking about me I deserve,” said my husband, today. Again. Spent a lot of the day curled up on my side on the bed. Wish I could pick a mood and stick with it, but once I … Continue reading
Posted in Grief, Reactions, Shock, Tragic
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Brazen
I have a fantasy where I grab the O.W. by the hair and forcefully shave a random pattern through her dark roots with unfettered delight. I imagine she struggles, but can’t break free. I see her in her blue turtleneck … Continue reading
Q and A
“Let me understand this. You had an affair.” “Yes.” “You went to a hotel?” “Yes. She made all of the arrangements.” “You went to a hotel to meet another woman.” “Yes.” “You went to a room and took your clothes … Continue reading
Posted in "Need to know", Affair, Discovery, Facebook, Lost Love, Opportunity, Other Woman, Reactions, Secrets, Shock, THE NEW REALITY, The Reveal
Tagged "need to know", Answers, this is about what I need, uncertainty
4 Comments
The Outburst
After a fairly quiet day, it’s become clear that my husband is substantially depressed. He stopped talking a few hours ago and then when I asked him about it, he said he was thinking about things. He just lost his … Continue reading
Posted in Depression, Reactions, Secrets
3 Comments
After His Affair 